You pull me in, skin on skin. I try to run, you pull me back again. ‘Cause there’s no end, the circle that we’re in. I guess I’m yours to guide.
– “Locked,” Welshly Arms
Well, yours truly is in a deeeeep mood today, so probably best to get some of this submissive energy out there so I can get some actual writing down without—um—distractions. With that in mind, allow me to share this week’s installment of Submissive Song Sunday, a sultry little number by Welshly Arms called “Locked.”
There’s something deep in the pulse of this song that moves me every time. The blend of softer, plaintive refrains with a hard-hitting chorus…a wicked guitar solo…and a singer who clearly feels every last note he’s belting out… 🥵 This one is borderline feral, folks – fair warning!
On the surface, this song delves into a toxic relationship of raw physicality from which the singer can’t escape. But—as I’m always on the lookout for that sweet, submissive, silver lining—I hear him describe the “twisted ride,” the “curse,” and the “hurt” as promises. As maxims to be attained, not avoided. There’s a craving of being locked into this relationship. A need to be pinned to the wall by it and forced to surrender. “I guess I’m yours to guide…”
I’d be curious if this one resonates with anyone else in our lovely D/s community. And, well, even if it doesn’t, you still get a great song out of it! 😉
Sentenced to the Doctor is set to come out on April 18, and I’m thrilled to get to share with you! Each week, as we get closer to the big day, I plan on sharing an excerpt with you to whet your appetite a bit.
In this week’s excerpt, we get a glimpse of Leila Jones’s first session with Dr. Jens Kelly at Reprogramming Center 629. She’s strapped into The Chair and getting her first taste of what her punishment will be like. Unfortunately, her mouthiness has already earned her a gag, so she’ll have to be the silent, suffering type for the time being.
Poor, poor Leila… 😉
Leila couldn’t remember a time when she had felt more exposed and overloaded. Spanked, probed, cleansed, clamped, restrained, and gagged, she tried to grapple with how much her circumstances had changed in such a short amount of time. And she was losing the battle.
“I can see you’re struggling with this, Leila,” Jens murmured as he stroked her forehead. “You don’t want to like it, but despite your best efforts, you do. And I want to make you feel good, want to give you a taste of how nice it can feel to cooperate and to accept your treatment.”
She tried, yet again, to pull away, not ready to admit what they both already knew. The readings from all the probes and sensors were clear as day. She was enjoying his treatment.
“If you want to keep on fighting this, by all means, that’s your prerogative,” he whispered, running his gloved fingertips down her neck, across her collarbone, and over her clamped nipple. “But how about we make a little deal?”
“Deal?” she asked, though it came out as a grunt through the gag. Leila found herself more than a little curious about why someone in his position, someone holding all the power, would be interested in negotiating with her.
“That’s right, a deal,” he said, a smile lacing his voice.
It would’ve been so easy for him to be menacing, to threaten her with his size and strength, but his voice was soft, coaxing, and friendly. Leila felt herself becoming seduced by her handsome doctor and decided to hear him out. As if she had a choice.
“I need you to climax for me in order to get a measured response posted to your record. As with everything else we do in here, I’ll use that information in your ongoing treatment program. Now, one way or another, I’m getting that reading. If you play nice and give me an orgasm, you’ll have the rest of the day off to take a shower and relax in your room. But if you keep fighting this, I can promise you won’t get a moment’s rest until you surrender.”
Friendly, authoritative, and gorgeous. It was a lethal combination Leila had never encountered before. When her eyes locked with his and registered his patience and concern for her, she nodded her assent. She’d give him what he wanted. And she’d be fooling herself if she acted as if she didn’t want it, too. Badly.
“That’s my good girl.”
Her pussy and anus tightened around the probes, registering on the console, betraying her body and soul, and giving him scientific proof of how much she loved his praise, how much she loved being a good girl for him. He made a few annotations and tapped a couple of commands into the tablet. The sensations vibrating through her core intensified and her hips rocked and humped the probes, desperate to gain some leverage and get the penetration she craved.
Dr. Kelly, smiling at her from between her legs, seated the probes more deeply and locked them in position, filling her just to the edge of pain. He then grabbed yet another, smaller implement from the tray. “Ready to give me what I want from you, Leila?”
She nodded quickly, desperate for release. He ran his gloved hand across her inner thigh as he touched a vibrating, stylus-like device to her straining clit. As the console beeped frantically in the background, an audible reflection of her imminent release, she bucked and screamed into the gag as he ran the device in circles around her taut bud. “That’s it. Let go for me. Let this happen, Leila. Give me your orgasm,” he encouraged her.
The whole session came to a head within moments—the spanking, the nudity, the defiance, the gag, the comfort, the fear, the exam, the restraints, Jens —and she gave herself over to the climax. A searing light of absolute pleasure flooded her body, pulling in from her extremities and coursing through her, causing her to tremble against every restraint holding her in place. Leila begged for it to end, begged for it to continue, begged for it to wipe away the pain and darkness inside her.
I hope you enjoyed that as much as I enjoyed writing and sharing it!
His hand extends to me from the darkness. To pleasure me? To hurt me? To blend the two extremes? I crave His dominance with everything that I am, yet I doubt my ability to remain intact in His presence.
How do I navigate something so powerful yet so terrifying? How do I look myself in the mirror and see anything other than His reflection staring back at me through my own eyes? How do I stand tall in my sense of self when every instinct commands me to kneel before Him?
I know where He’ll lead me…where He’ll drag me, kicking and screaming…where He’ll weave his way into the most private corners of my soul. Am I powerless to stop Him?
Or am I wise enough not to try?
I’ve been noodling on a few sketches/vignettes for some of my protagonists and thought I’d share these with you for thoughts and input! Plus, this gives me a way to purge these ideas, make way for some new ones, and (hopefully) turn a few readers on in the process! 😉 Enjoy!
Shame on you Shame on me I blindly blame you When truly
You’re my blanket, you’re my skin You’re everything within You’re my guardian, I’m your sail A boat in your harbor Gone under, capsized and sinking Blanket me, blanket me, blanket me, blanket me, blanket me…
– “Blanket Me,” Hundred Waters
Here’s another song that’s a go-to on my erotica writing playlist. “Blanket Me” by Hundred Waters is ethereal, haunting, powerful, evocative, all-consuming…all the things that D/s can be when it’s at its most sublime.
There is a heart-breaking vulnerability in her voice as she accuses him of leading her astray, leading her into the darkness, leading her into places she’s forbidden to go… Yet she quickly recognizes that he is her protector and savior, the one who can rescue her from plummeting into the darkness. She begs him for his protection…to be blanketed by his dominance.
This emotional tug-of-war is captivating in its simple intensity and the “blanket me” repetition at the end of the song has a mesmerizing, meditative quality about it. She has found her best and highest purpose when wrapped in his protection, his care, his love.
Mr. Elise and I are about to have a house full of family for a few days.* Yes, I’m thrilled to have visitors. And yes, it will be lovely to connect with them in our home. But this is a curious situation in which Reality, with a capital “R”, intrudes on my reality and the results are jarring, abrasive, and unsettling.
Jaye Elise lives in a computer, in my mind, in my friends here, and in my readers. “The other one” has to do the day-to-day heavy lifting, she’s the one with the visitors in the house, and she’s the one who can’t be her true self in front of others.
And so, just like so many before me and so many yet to come—and I imagine many of you, too—I’ll put on my mask. I’ll wear it as long as I have to and not a minute longer. Mr. Elise and I will try to carve out stolen moments to drop our guard and see each other for who we really are.
We’ll bide our time until our reality becomes the one with the capital “R” again.
*I probably won’t be posting too much either, but I can’t wait to come back and find out what I’ve missed! 🙂
So I’ll hit the lights and you lock the doors. We ain’t leaving this room ’til we both feel more.Don’t walk away, don’t roll your eyes.They say love is pain, well darling, let’s hurt tonight.
– “Let’s Hurt Tonight,” OneRepublic
When I’m in writing mode, I have a carefully curated playlist I listen to. Nothing too energetic, nothing too beat-heavy, nothing too distracting. But every single song has some sexual electricity woven into it. It occurred to me that I could share some of my songs that get me into a positive frame of mind for writing and reinforce my submissive headspace. (Plus, I’d love to hear some of your suggestions in the comments!)
I’ve always enjoyed identifying supposedly “vanilla” songs and teasing out D/s subtext in the lyrics. Granted, I enjoy overt sexuality in songs, too. “Closer” by Nine Inch Nails, anyone? 🥵 But the Submissive Song segment is all about the subtleties…and alliteration, evidently. It’s about finding the songs that resonate with our inner kinksters, even when this might not have been the songwriter’s original intention. For this week’s Submissive Song Sunday, I present to you “Let’s Hurt Tonight” by OneRepublic.
On the surface, it’s the story of a couple that’s struggling to communicate, struggling to connect. They’re exhausted, they’re upset, they’re defensive. The man proposes confronting their challenges by shutting themselves away from the rest of the world and breaking through the stalemate they’re in.
Buuuut, as I’m sure my fellow kinkyfolk will acknowledge after a quick scan of those lyrics above, there is something delectably D/s-charged about this exchange. It’s no longer just a plea to do the emotional heavy-lifting that has to occur; it’s an invitation to sink their teeth into the moment and share the catharsis of a pain session.
They say love is pain, well darling, let’s hurt tonight.
Just as a little FYI, the idea behind the Triple Play Q&A is to feature erotica/romance authors to showcase their work, to give them an outlet to share a bit about themselves, and to have them answer three questions—some serious, some seriously silly—in an effort to get to know them better. For my first Triple Play Q&A in years, I’m reviving the series with fellow erotica author and friend, Jonathan Grey. Many of you may already know him from his blog—Grey Man’s Memoirs—and his short-form erotic fiction…and if you haven’t checked out his stories yet, please do yourself a favor and head on over there!
In addition to sharing content on his blog, Jon recently published a novel, Bound for Better or Worse. This is the first installment in his Bonded series, so be sure to have a look!
Welcome to the Triple Play Q&A, Jon!
Hello, Jaye, thanks for having me. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m Jonathan Grey. Yes, it is a pen name to protect the innocent near me since I am far from innocent myself. A fan of the D/s dynamic for decades, I’ve read a lot of it and done a bit with it. Writing for me always seems to dip into the power exchange inherent in romantic relationships. I also have a platinum nerd card in many areas: sci-fi, fantasy, gaming, movies, etc. I always enjoy a good conversation, especially with those of a submissive persuasion.
What does your writing space look like when you’re in the thick of a project?
The world is my office. I do some of my writing at home, but most of it is done at a small table in an eatery at one of my five favorite shopping malls. Why there? I love to people-watch. Ok, I love to watch female people. My observations at these Happy Places have often inspired characters or even storylines. I usually have my laptop open, food next to me, carbonated caffeine ready, and I might be wearing my BOSE headphones for some concentration.
If you were to perform karaoke, which song would you pick and why?
I performed “Sweet Home Alabama” at a bar in Austin, TX, and recorded it on YouTube. I share it only with a very select few. My favorite song to perform would be “Your Mama Don’t Dance” by Loggins and Messina. Why? I know it frontwards and backwards, and it always makes me laugh. My second choice would be “Minnie the Moocher” by Cab Calloway. I’ve done this on stage with karaoke backup…also on YouTube.
If you ran into your thirteen year-old self, what piece of solid advice would you give him?
“Dude, chill. It’ll happen sooner and better than you think it will. Pay more attention to being the real you and forget what others tell you is right.” That’s the printable version of my advice to self. 😉
Thank you, Jon, for joining me today for the Triple Play Q&A, and congratulations on your new novel! I’ve already got a copy loaded on my Kindle and ready to go! If your other fiction is any indication, I’m hopeful the next books come out quickly!
And thank you, dear readers, for stopping by for the segment. If you’re an erotica author (or erotica-adjacent!) and you’d like to be featured here, reach out to me via the contact form on my blog. I promise I won’t bite…unless that’s your thing… 😉
I’ve been lucky enough in this life to have had some amazing, powerful, transcendental experiences.
I’ve published multiple novels…including one on the way! I’ve ridden a horse in the wee hours of the morning through the streets of the city. I’ve made love on a beach in the Caribbean. I’ve watched the sun rise from the summit of a volcano. I’ve skied through mountains with the pine air caressing my skin. I’ve fallen in love with every fiber of my being and have had my heart broken into millions of pieces—more than once. I’ve savored the sweet nectar of submission as it coursed through my veins.
It occurs to me that each and every one of these experiences involved a risk/reward calculus. And, on occasion, I’ve taken some pretty significant risks—some of which make me shake my head in disbelief when I think about them. I’ve placed myself in a few dangerous-as-hell situations, situations that would give Mr. Elise a twitchy palm just to hear of them. (Please don’t tell him!) 😉
But I’m fortunate enough to still be here to tell the tales and to revel in the woman I was, the woman I am, the woman I’m becoming. The rewards for such risks are self-evident.
And yes, sometimes you risk it all and your reward is pain.
And yes, sometimes that’s the reward you were seeking the whole time.
Jaye Elise writes... 