There are days when I’ll go heads-down and write without surfacing for hours. I’ll grab a cup of coffee, take a quick bathroom break, and get right back into it, eager to pick up where I left off. These are usually the days when my hottest, nastiest, sexiest ideas come to the forefront of my mind and I scramble to try and collect them at their most intense and lascivious.

And then there are days when I struggle to make it through a scene without resorting to using the word “boner”. Jesus.

Whether feast or famine, I find it’s helpful to remind myself that – just as in physical sexual relations – there are ebbs and flows when it comes to writing sex. Especially when you write erotica. The tension gets stagnant. The vocabulary you once savored falls flat. Your protagonists bump up against each other, all elbows and angles.

And just as in physical sexual relations, when you ride out the wonderful moments in waves of ecstasy, sometimes there’s a lull in the action until that next wave crests. But without that awkward, uncomfortable lull, you wouldn’t be able to appreciate the thrill of coasting that next wave to pure bliss.

So, now, about that boner…